A New Dawn, A New Day, A New Life!
For me! Could this song be any more appropriate for me in this moment?
I moved into my new place on Saturday. It's the cutest little apartment ever! A one bedroom with a patio and fireplace! It's so me! It feels like home and I love it! Saturday morning, after a great rehearsal with John, Courtney and I went and lunched at Chipotle before attempting to move! She and I got one load in the truck over to the new place and another load in the truck. Dave, Adrian, and Scott showed up to help with the rest of it and the heavy stuff! They seriously are amazing men! Court and I would have been lost and broken without them on Saturday. They got my bedroom and washer and dryer over to the new place. Dave even got the washer hooked up. The dryer needs a new silver tube thing to make it work. Later in the evening, Chris showed up and helped with the last little bit. Courtney, Scott, and I have some beer and pizza while we set up my new bedroom. Scott brought me a gorgeous bouquet of flowers as a house warming gift! The bedroom is done! The bathroom is done! I slept so well Saturday night! Sunday was the first full cast rehearsal for Much Ado! It was so great to hear all the voices, see the faces, and bond over cheese and cookies! I'm so very excited about this show and I'm so ready to dive right in and get it on it's feet! John and I are good with lines and blocking. We just need to keep at it! We start dance rehearsals tonight! I can't wait!
Abby and I had a small conversation via text on Saturday. She asked me if she could keep the dining room table. I said it was hers! She said thank you and I said you're welcome. A very small conversation, but nonetheless, some kind of communication. She moves on Thursday. I hope it goes well for her and the wind does not beat her allergies down like it did mine. I pray every night for her. I know God has something in the works here and I'm trying to be patient and listen, but I'm without a sister right now and it hurts so much. I know that she has things to work out and I have to let her do it. I can't do it for her. I can't keep protecting her and trying to make up for years of being angry and disappearing while I was growing up. I pray that she will see that the past is the past and she needs to let it go. It's over and done and can't be changed. I pray that she will let go of her anger and start living her life in the now, instead of the past! I pray every night that she will remember that I love her and all I want for her is her happiness and peace. I pray that one day I will get my sister back!
Greg... where do I start? I've been having some weird dreams lately and he has been in them all. There was a dream with a swing that he and I were swinging around in circles. There was one where he left me after I got a new car. There was a dream with cars going down ski slopes and double doors opening when I passed them. Last night, however, my ex fiance was in my dream. And good grief... what a dream! Greg posted new pics on Facebook and this one girl keeps showing up in all the photos. I don't know what to think, but I do know that I'm not sure how long I can wait again. I waited in silence for 2 years while he was in prison and now, after several months of he and I being he and I again, I have to wait again for him to get his life in order. Why do I have to wait again? Should I have to wait? Why did I wait to begin with? Why am I waiting now? Is this the man God wants me to be with? Is this the guy that will make me happy; truly happy? Why am I questioning this? Is that a sign that maybe this is not what God wants for me? Someone once told me that "if it's from God, then it won't be difficult". Is that the truth or was that just his way of trying to justify something in his life? I know that God has someone wonderful out there that will love me as much as I will love them! I truly believe that I deserve that kind of love. I didn't for a long time, but I do now. Is this man Greg or is it someone completely new or is it someone that I know and never saw in that light until I do?
Someone has a new tattoo and still has not paid me for her half of the software I purchased for the both of us.
In one of many conversations Court and I have had, I have come to realize that I think I understand what God is trying to do in my life presently. He has taken away from me, but only to prepare me, somehow, for better things! I was robbed in January, lost my sister in February, and lost Greg in March. This is the only reason that I can come up with. God is just preparing me for bigger and better things. It's like He is getting ready to bless me in a way that I could have never dreamed of. I just have to be PATIENT (this is not one of my strong suits) and wait! I know I can do it and I know I will be rewarded for my patience. I just have to do it. So, I'm trying! I'm trying to keep a positive attitude and laugh everyday! I'm reminding myself everyday how blessed I am to have what I have and to be where I am and to be surrounded by my amazing family and the most wonderful friends and to have the BEST friend a gal could ever ask for, Courtney! I know that I am blessed. God has given me talents to use and I use them in His name! I know that I can do this and I know the rewards on the other side will be great and plentiful!
I just ask that you pray for me! There is so much going on right now, I just need patience and determination!
I moved into my new place on Saturday. It's the cutest little apartment ever! A one bedroom with a patio and fireplace! It's so me! It feels like home and I love it! Saturday morning, after a great rehearsal with John, Courtney and I went and lunched at Chipotle before attempting to move! She and I got one load in the truck over to the new place and another load in the truck. Dave, Adrian, and Scott showed up to help with the rest of it and the heavy stuff! They seriously are amazing men! Court and I would have been lost and broken without them on Saturday. They got my bedroom and washer and dryer over to the new place. Dave even got the washer hooked up. The dryer needs a new silver tube thing to make it work. Later in the evening, Chris showed up and helped with the last little bit. Courtney, Scott, and I have some beer and pizza while we set up my new bedroom. Scott brought me a gorgeous bouquet of flowers as a house warming gift! The bedroom is done! The bathroom is done! I slept so well Saturday night! Sunday was the first full cast rehearsal for Much Ado! It was so great to hear all the voices, see the faces, and bond over cheese and cookies! I'm so very excited about this show and I'm so ready to dive right in and get it on it's feet! John and I are good with lines and blocking. We just need to keep at it! We start dance rehearsals tonight! I can't wait!
Abby and I had a small conversation via text on Saturday. She asked me if she could keep the dining room table. I said it was hers! She said thank you and I said you're welcome. A very small conversation, but nonetheless, some kind of communication. She moves on Thursday. I hope it goes well for her and the wind does not beat her allergies down like it did mine. I pray every night for her. I know God has something in the works here and I'm trying to be patient and listen, but I'm without a sister right now and it hurts so much. I know that she has things to work out and I have to let her do it. I can't do it for her. I can't keep protecting her and trying to make up for years of being angry and disappearing while I was growing up. I pray that she will see that the past is the past and she needs to let it go. It's over and done and can't be changed. I pray that she will let go of her anger and start living her life in the now, instead of the past! I pray every night that she will remember that I love her and all I want for her is her happiness and peace. I pray that one day I will get my sister back!
Greg... where do I start? I've been having some weird dreams lately and he has been in them all. There was a dream with a swing that he and I were swinging around in circles. There was one where he left me after I got a new car. There was a dream with cars going down ski slopes and double doors opening when I passed them. Last night, however, my ex fiance was in my dream. And good grief... what a dream! Greg posted new pics on Facebook and this one girl keeps showing up in all the photos. I don't know what to think, but I do know that I'm not sure how long I can wait again. I waited in silence for 2 years while he was in prison and now, after several months of he and I being he and I again, I have to wait again for him to get his life in order. Why do I have to wait again? Should I have to wait? Why did I wait to begin with? Why am I waiting now? Is this the man God wants me to be with? Is this the guy that will make me happy; truly happy? Why am I questioning this? Is that a sign that maybe this is not what God wants for me? Someone once told me that "if it's from God, then it won't be difficult". Is that the truth or was that just his way of trying to justify something in his life? I know that God has someone wonderful out there that will love me as much as I will love them! I truly believe that I deserve that kind of love. I didn't for a long time, but I do now. Is this man Greg or is it someone completely new or is it someone that I know and never saw in that light until I do?
Someone has a new tattoo and still has not paid me for her half of the software I purchased for the both of us.
In one of many conversations Court and I have had, I have come to realize that I think I understand what God is trying to do in my life presently. He has taken away from me, but only to prepare me, somehow, for better things! I was robbed in January, lost my sister in February, and lost Greg in March. This is the only reason that I can come up with. God is just preparing me for bigger and better things. It's like He is getting ready to bless me in a way that I could have never dreamed of. I just have to be PATIENT (this is not one of my strong suits) and wait! I know I can do it and I know I will be rewarded for my patience. I just have to do it. So, I'm trying! I'm trying to keep a positive attitude and laugh everyday! I'm reminding myself everyday how blessed I am to have what I have and to be where I am and to be surrounded by my amazing family and the most wonderful friends and to have the BEST friend a gal could ever ask for, Courtney! I know that I am blessed. God has given me talents to use and I use them in His name! I know that I can do this and I know the rewards on the other side will be great and plentiful!
I just ask that you pray for me! There is so much going on right now, I just need patience and determination!
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