And I'm Done.... for the last time, done!
Greg and I are done, finished, never again, over, last time, concluded, chapter closed, terminated, it's time to move on and not look back! Why do men make this more difficult than it needs to be? Why are men so afraid of the truth? Do you think women can't handle the truth? Like we're not tough enough? Like your truth will break us? Like we're made of such fragile material that we can't handle or take the truth? I'm sorry, but we're women. We can handle more than you can and more than you give us credit for!
Greg, did you think I would not figure it out? Did you think that I wouldn't see the pictures? Did you think you were protecting me by feeling me a line of bullshit? Did you think I would fall apart because you and I can't be together anymore? Did you really think that? Like I needed you? No sir! I don't need anyone. I need God and my family and my best friend! I don't need a man, I want a man. And from your actions, you're not a man. You're a child and I deserve so much better than that!
I'm a catch! I got my ducks in a row! I have a great job, a gorgeous new apartment, a car that gets me where I need to go, an intelligent brain in my head, a keen intellect, a maturity that far exceeds many people's, I know what I want in life and am taking steps to get there, a family that supports my every endeavor, a best friend that means more than life to me, dreams and aspirations, and I'm a good looking woman! I know where my power lies and you just can't handle it! I'm sorry that you can't handle it. I'm sorry that you will have to settle for less than me in this life because as far as I am concerned this ship has sailed and never again will dock in your port. You missed out buddy... and that is something you will have to live with the rest of your life.
So, thank you for hurting me, once again. Hurt me once, shame on you. Hurt me twice, shame on me. And I take the blame, you just have to live with the consequences.
Goodbye!
Greg, did you think I would not figure it out? Did you think that I wouldn't see the pictures? Did you think you were protecting me by feeling me a line of bullshit? Did you think I would fall apart because you and I can't be together anymore? Did you really think that? Like I needed you? No sir! I don't need anyone. I need God and my family and my best friend! I don't need a man, I want a man. And from your actions, you're not a man. You're a child and I deserve so much better than that!
I'm a catch! I got my ducks in a row! I have a great job, a gorgeous new apartment, a car that gets me where I need to go, an intelligent brain in my head, a keen intellect, a maturity that far exceeds many people's, I know what I want in life and am taking steps to get there, a family that supports my every endeavor, a best friend that means more than life to me, dreams and aspirations, and I'm a good looking woman! I know where my power lies and you just can't handle it! I'm sorry that you can't handle it. I'm sorry that you will have to settle for less than me in this life because as far as I am concerned this ship has sailed and never again will dock in your port. You missed out buddy... and that is something you will have to live with the rest of your life.
So, thank you for hurting me, once again. Hurt me once, shame on you. Hurt me twice, shame on me. And I take the blame, you just have to live with the consequences.
Goodbye!
1) I am so glad you and Courtney have each other. I think God puts certain people in our lives and there are times when one or the other is not ready for that person. I feel like through EVERYTHING, I was too immature to be a good friend to Courtney (in fact, I don't think I ever was a good friend to her and it really haunts me) while she was ready to be a MAGNIFICENT friend to me. Then I met Josh, then y'all met, and it was all this weird out-of-our-hands timing that was absolutely perfect. I am so glad you have her, and I am SO glad she has you. Courtney is (quite possibly) the girl with the kindest heart. She has patience like I have never seen from anyone. Y’all are both 'old souls' looking to make it in a young world, and I admire you both SO much. You are a beautiful pair and I am so happy that you have each other to make one another smile, comfort each other, etc. 2) This friend that owes you $200! I know this person, and maybe this IS the time to cut the ties. Again, this is a time to count your blessings while you WERE friends....and then move on. Perhaps this friend, like me, is not in a place where Emily Kate is needed. (Or maybe you are needed and this 'friend' does not realize it) You know the saying "If you love them let them go....if they come back, then it is meant to be?" I think this was NEVER meant to be about LOVE interests, but about friends. A true friend will be able to pick up a convo with you after MONTHS of not talking to you. Sometimes we have to hurt someone in order for them to see the significance or our friendship and what we mean to them, you know? 3) Now, Greg: Greg, Greg, Greg. Yes, I believe he was honest when he says he has to work on himself. Apparently, though, he is NOT doing that if he is already 'mixing' with another girl. Do NOT beat yourself up for this OR say, "shame on me!" How were you to know that he would do such a thing, and LIE about it? I had a guy say the exact same things to me...and he had a girl that he had been seeing, as well. I know that is painful, and I thought this guy seemed to be a great one, and though I endured a few more heartaches, I finally met Josh, and my heart learned what love is! I will say, you have to look at it as though when you were with him, it was a fantasy world, not reality. He told you things that will NEVER be true: just like make-believe is not true. And how were you to know that it would be that way. So, as long as you can remember that Greg is NOT reality (and it may take a while), you will be in a better spot. 4) Okay, now the REALLY tricky part: your sister. First off, having two sisters myself, I feel like I understand COMPLETELY the importance of a simple, yet much-needed text conversation. With anything, I think that just needs time. Ultimately, your family is the biggest rock to cling to (next to God) because they have been there from the start and will be there in the end (hopefully). I truly pray that things will work out with the two of you. I'm so sorry that it has come to this. I will pray for more texts, for the texts to increase, for the texts to turn to phone calls, the phone calls to lunch dates, the lunch dates to endless hours of conversation, the endless hours of conversation to turn into a beautiful, sisterly relationship again! I hope you don't take this as preachy, I just HAD to tell you (in a million words) that I am praying for you, that I love you, that you are stronger because of all this, that God DOES have a plan, that I pray for patience for you while He takes his time to reveal it (I know that is an important one...and is one I struggled with), that you are wonderful, that you deserve the best, and that you are truly one of the most talented, lovely, loving, caring, beautiful, FABULOUS women I know! I love you, Emily! (And love the blog!)
ReplyDeletePS....that was truly the LONGEST comment I have EVER made! It took me 3 tries to get it to fit! (They kept saying, NO MORE THAN 4089 characters!)
ReplyDeleteOh, sweet, sweet Lauren. I am in tears right now. Sweeter words of compassion were never spoken and the the truth was imminent through it all. You have such a sweet spirit and kind heart, I'm blessed to call you friend! Your comment was not at all preachy, I love and cherish every word of it! I love you, Lauren! Thank you for taking the time to read and hear me! I can't tell you how much I appreciate it! Thank you!
ReplyDeleteThat is probably the longest and most adorable comment I have ever read from Lauren. (Or anyone for that matter!)
ReplyDeleteLet me start off by saying she's right. Courtney has a very compassionate heart for her friends and she's learned all that patience by having me as her little sister!
As for Abby, you just have to give it time. You don't have the communication that Courtney and I have. Yes I get upset with her from time to time but we work it out and it never ruins our relationship because we've been sisters for 22 years. You and Abby...not so much. In the meantime I consider you the older sister I never had. (Courtney already acts like the middle child, so it works out!) My mom considers you another daughter so you always have Courtney and I as your back up sisters while you work things out.
Just remember that God works wonders and even though things seem impossible, he has a plan that is far greater than anything we can imagine! Abby has already taken steps in the right direction and we thought that would never happen!
I'm always praying for you girl, and I love you! :)
CASEY! Thank you! I would love to be apart of the Brown family! I'm so privileged that you consider me an older sister! That means so very much to me!
ReplyDeleteI pray for her every night that God will soften her heart and open her eyes! I'm so happy to know that she has taken steps in the right direction. Whatever those steps may be, may they continue on the right path and lead her to ultimate peace, happiness, and love!